I used to feel adored. My husband used to say that when he thought of sex, it was always with me. We have been married for 48 years. I am 70, he is 72. Quite by accident, I discovered my husband watches pornography and searches online for women in underwear to ogle.
I am utterly devastated. The latter upsets me more than the porn. He used to ask me to wear sexy underwear, but hasn’t for a long time. I thought it was because he was older, but now I know he hasn’t lost interest in sex, just in me. By the same token, given his age, I could feel the same. But I don’t. I feel betrayed, hurt, old and ugly. We have a close family who would be torn apart if we were to split up. I don’t want to confide in my friends. I don’t know how to get over this.
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