By Dafna Lemish
Media can help your children during the current crisis.
Websites, broadcasts, cable TV, DVDs, video games, and other forms of information and entertainment can teach them, release tension, allow them to immerse themselves in fantasy and fun and keep them busy and out of danger. The media can facilitate staying in touch with their friends and relatives, provide school continuity and a structure for their days during school closures.
Media provide shared viewing opportunities for families, which can foster a sense of togetherness and bonding during a stressful time. And, admittedly, our children’s media times are also helpful to us as parents, giving us a much deserved and needed break, allowing us to re-energize ourselves as well as deal with our own pressures and stresses.
On the other hand, media can also overstimulate young brains and teach aggressive behavior, encourage passivity and unhealthy eating, trigger fear and anxiety and cultivate gender and racial stereotypes. It can easily swallow up too much time away from much-needed activities that promote physical and mental health and divert them from supportive human connections with family members around them.
Some 70 years of research on the roles of media in children’s lives have taught us: Media are wonderful resources when used thoughtfully, selectively and with clear parental oversight. This is key to the way we should think about taking advantage of media during the current situation to support our children and their well-being.
There are no clear rules of what and how much is appropriate for each child. But we can focus on three domains, summarized by the three Cs of media use by children:
- The Child: Since each child is unique, their gender, age, ability and personality characteristics may need different content and activities. Similarly, consider the period of media time appropriate for each child. Also, ask if they may become frightened more easily by particular content or delighted from a different kind.
- The Content: Consider if the content your child is watching, playing with or surfing on screens is age-appropriate, fits your family values and is not affecting your child emotionally and behaviorally in negative ways. You might note that your child is upset, scared, restless, angered? Perhaps whatever s/he is doing with media may not be helpful for him/her. Is s/he having fun, learning valuable information or social values and managing well his/her emotions? If so, you can trust that these activities are indeed helpful.
- The Context: Your family context makes a difference on how you use media. The general national context these days certainly impacts children’s media use, often dramatically. But so, too, the number and locations of devices in your home; how many family members are sharing them; your cultural, religious, racial, class and immigration background.
How then, should we manage our children’s media use, taking into consideration the Cs of the child, content and context?
- First, discussing together their media activities will enable you to learn about your children’s media needs and preferences.
- Agree on some rules about what can be viewed, activities to be engaged in, when, for how long and where in the home.
- Remember to balance media use with other activities that allow your child to complete school work, to engage in play time and art, physical exercise and movement, and contribute to the family’s life and chores in an age-appropriate way.
- Remember also to include more traditional media that carry immense value for your children, such as reading books and listening to music.
Being active, engaged with others, maintaining some daily routines and having a sense of purpose can be as important for our children as it is for us, the adults in their lives.
And, yes, cut yourself some slack. It is OK under the circumstances to spend more time with media than you might have under different circumstances.
Here are a few helpful resources for parents during coronavirus times:
Dafna Lemish is a Distinguished Professor and associate dean at the School of Communication and Information at Rutgers University. Her books include Fear in front of the screen: Children’s fears, nightmares and thrills; Children and Media: A global perspective; and Children and media in times of war and conflict
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