I'm 46 and have been single for years. How can I meet someone and fall in love?

I’m a 46-year-old woman and have been single for years. I’m happy being alone, but would love to be in a relationship, but I can’t seem to find anyone. I have tried internet dating and I’m sick of the pub scene, although I’m happy to talk to anyone and I’m told I’m very funny. I’m kind and sensitive and I probably think too much. I would do anything for people I care about. I’m not bad looking, I take care of myself but not to the point of being obsessive. When I was younger, I dated very good-looking men and always fell for the wrong guys. I haven’t given up hope, but I really don’t know if I will ever meet someone and fall in love. I’m tired of being told: “When you stop looking you’ll find someone.” I stopped looking years ago!

When leaving a message on this page, please be sensitive to the fact that you are responding to a real person in the grip of a real-life dilemma, who wrote to Private Lives asking for help, and may well view your comments here. Please consider especially how your words or the tone of your message could be perceived by someone in this situation, and be aware that comments that appear to be disruptive or disrespectful to the individual concerned will be removed.

Comments on this piece are premoderated to ensure discussion remains on topics raised by the writer. Please be aware there may be a short delay in comments appearing on the site.

If you would like fellow readers to respond to a dilemma of yours, send us an outline of the situation of about 150 words. For advice from Pamela Stephenson Connolly on sexual matters, send us a brief description of your concerns.

All correspondence should reach us by Wednesday morning. Email (please don’t send attachments). Submissions are subject to our terms and conditions: see


Leave a Reply

This website uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you accept our use of cookies.