If I say the words professor, scientist or pilot to you, what, or rather, who do you think of? If you tell me it’s a working mum of three I’ll say, ‘yeah, right’.
Go on, admit it, you see a man for each one. How about midwife, childcare worker or secretary – well obviously they are women, how could they be anything else?
What if a dad wants to take some time off to care for his children, or just leave work early to pick them up, is that being a ‘real man’ or does he feel a bit awkward about asking his boss?
Or if a woman reports that she has been raped do the police treat her as a victim and investigate the crime or do they ask for her mobile phone so they can check up on her relationship history? The underlying attitude is that she has done something wrong. It must be her fault.
At the heart of all of these examples, and much more, are our highly gendered attitudes determining what we perceive to be normal.
These stereotypes are imposed upon us before we are born and then continue and multiply throughout our lives. Evidence shows that parents, unwittingly, promote and transmit these stereotypes, creating difference where there is none.
Schools then add their share, giving boys more classroom attention or praising girls for being pretty or kind rather than rewarding them for being competitive or recognising them as clever.
Stereotypes contribute to girls’ perceptions of themselves, their expectation to take second place, play a supporting role, put others first; their struggle to see subjects such as maths, physics or economics as being for them because they aren’t perceived to be ‘feminine’.
Those segregated shopping aisles or websites divided by ‘for girls’ ‘for boys’ labels are designed to drive us to buy more products. But I think parents and children actually want something better.
It’s why girls then grow up to be women who think their appearance matters more than their intellect or capability. Why we think older men are sexy and older women are well, just past it. All of this lasts a lifetime.
It’s why women hold back from leadership roles, or even applying for jobs when amply qualified, while men will readily apply if they can do 60 per cent of the role.
And I’m sorry can I just say… it’s why women often begin a sentence with an apology.
But it also affects boys – 59 per cent of people say it’s harder for a boy to be ‘feminine’ than it is for a girl to be a ‘tomboy’. Boys struggle with communicating their emotions, or managing their anger.
It leads to a toxic masculine culture where anything less than macho is deemed to be abnormal. Why dads are inhibited from caring for their children. This of course, has a negative impact on women’s lives too.
But the prevailing norm is that gender stereotypes are good for business.
A new poll released today shows that six in 10 parents say product marketing reinforce stereotypes about what boys and girls can do.
Those segregated shopping aisles or websites divided by ‘for girls’ ‘for boys’ labels are designed to drive us to buy more products. But I think parents and children actually want something better.
Our society and our economy certainly needs change. This is why my charity, the Fawcett Society, has today launched a new Commission on Gender Stereotypes in Early Childhood.
Over the next year we will be collecting evidence and bringing experts from the worlds of parenting, education, neuroscience, government and retail together to examine the evidence on the impact of gender stereotypes not only in childhood, but throughout our lives, and what we can do to change it.
The problem is endemic, but evidence shows that we can change it. Interventions in the classroom or to support parents to challenge stereotypes can change perceptions and change children’s lives.
But we need to confront the scale of the challenge and drive lasting attitudinal change. Or we will continue to pay the high price of the gender pay gap; growing self-harm among teenagers and violence against women and girls.
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