Vacations are typically associated with summers, but this doesn’t always have to be the case. Many people escape dreary winters on getaways to the tropics, or by taking cruises across the ocean. One great thing about video games is that they allow you to explore fictional settings, be they completely based in fantasy, or hypothetical reimaginings of real-world locations.
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This list will focus on areas from video games that, while they might seem inviting at first glance, would make terrible vacation destinations if they were to exist in real life, ranking them on how tolerable a holiday trip would be.
8 Royal Palms Resort (Dead Island)
Great Beach Vibes – Fingers Crossed You’re Immune, Though…
- Things to Do: 5/10
- Food: 4/10
- Locals: 9/10
- Visuals: 9/10
Royal Palms Resort in Dead Island, and the accompanying islands around it, are not the greatest place to visit, but not the worst either. The views are beautiful, and the line between wild life and urban life is quite thin, with jungle and mountains never being too far away from civilization.
The biggest gripe that can be made about the resort is the infectious undead that roam the area. But even then, these can be actively avoided and mostly keep to themselves, even if that means you have to gear up before your convenience store runs. While it could be a side effect of the apocalypse, there isn’t much food on the island either, except for energy drinks and protein bars. While this, thankfully, is nearly half the diet of any gamer, the lack of pizza or chips becomes noticeable very quickly.
7 The Maw (Little Nightmares)
Plenty To Eat – Don’t Question The Meat
Little Nightmares
Survival Horror
Puzzle
Platformer
- Developer(s)
- Tarsier Studios
- Released
- April 28, 2017
- Things to Do: 4/10
- Food: 10/10
- Locals: 2/10
- Visuals: 8/10
The Maw is like a cruise, pleasure boat, and restaurant all rolled into one in Little Nightmares. There are people who stay, people who visit, and people that work there to make everything happen. Of all the entries on this list, The Maw has the most options in terms of food, ranging from sausages and steaks to fish — and a bunch of ethically questionable meats in between.
Despite the drab underbelly of the ship, it looks quite nice, with well decorated areas for sitting and eating, which visitors will be doing quite a bit, as the portions given are extremely generous. General tips, however, would be to avoid the little people scurrying around and not wearing shoes, and don’t get trapped and forced to work there for eternity.
6 Rook Island (Far Cry 3)
Fantastic Views, Sketchy Locals
- Things to Do: 6/10
- Food: 4/10
- Locals: 5/10 (not counting vicious animals)
- Visuals: 9/10
Rook Island is not the best suited for vacation goers. While the onboarding experience may be a bit rough, there are a lot of cool activities in the form of minigames like Jet Ski Races, Knife Throwing, Sharpshooting, and Poker. While these are fun, and the locals that take part in these are great, the Far Cry 3 island is pretty hostile.
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Aside from the literal pirates that roam the island, the wildlife is also inexplicably hostile toward humans. One would think that from all the contact with people there that they would be less keen on attacking and eating people. Even the birds attack people! It’s unnatural. Wamanaki town is a must-see, though, especially at night when all the string lights are on.
5 The Island (Fortnite)
Most Activities To Do, But Trapped In A Forever Loop
- Things to Do: 10/10
- Food: 7/10
- Locals: 2/10
- Visuals: 5/10
The Fortnite Island might be the most packed entry on the list when it comes to things to do. From driving boats and race cars to ziplining, there are tons of activities to do — with more being added or changed out pretty regularly. This is due to the fact that the island gets a facelift every few months with new seasons, with added biomes and points of interest that come with their own variety of snacks, activities, and souvenirs to collect.
The only issue with the island: of the 100 visitors allowed on, only a select few are allowed to leave in good health. This means that visitors will have to forcibly and often violently remove each other from the island to leave, which can be a bit stressful, and definitely a downer for many loopers. Unless achieving victory, characters are trapped in the island’s battle royale loop. While the various foods look delicious, and the many variations of Splash look great, the positives seem pretty insignificant against the statistic that you are 100x more likely to die horrifically in an explosion than see your way through.
4 Wam Bam Island (Borderlands 2)
Quite Dangerous And Not Much To Do
- Things to Do: 2/10
- Food: 1/10
- Locals: 1/10
- Visuals: 8/10
Wam Bam island is probably one of the worst vacation spots a family could go to. There are no restaurants, no food, and the locals of Borderlands 2 do want to kill you. Not only are the little crabs very hostile, but there’s also an incredibly large one that lives underground completely unchecked, with the ability to kidnap you by burrowing in the ground, turning the sand under you into quicksand, and plucking you from the surface.
The locals are interesting but deadly, existing in the “bloodthirsty pirate” and “native islander that knows deadly magicks” varieties. On the positive side, it is gorgeous and seems to be less polluted than the rest of Borderland 2‘s areas, operating on energy sourced from the town’s waterfall, as well as the active volcano on the island, which would never be a safety concern.
3 Cancer City Megamall (Cruelty Squad)
Games, Pizza, And Good Decor
- Things to Do: 3/10
- Food: 6/10
- Locals: 4/10
- Visuals: 10/10
The Megamall in Cruelty Squad is a little more than a typical mall, as it not only has food courts and stores but also serves as a community center where political candidates will battle it out on the big stage. It has pizza, a game store, a smoke shop, and an outdoor courtyard atop the whole structure.
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While each of these sounds cool in its own right, there are some serious distractions for each. For instance, the smoke shop is called “Flower Heaven,” where the plants are alive and will crawl around on the floor and vomit acid on you. The game store, “GamesGames,” doesn’t even have any copies of Gorbino’s Quest. Also, the security is unnecessarily tight, with dual-wielding undead cyborgs patrolling the place with little regard for the safety of shoppers and visitors. The zombie blood church is pretty cool, though.
2 The Handsome Jackpot (Borderlands 3)
A Tourist Trap In The Most Literal Sense
- Things To Do: 1/10
- Food: 1/10
- Locals: 4/10
- Visuals: 4/10
The Handsome Jackpot from Borderlands 3 is a cool place on paper for most people: it’s a casino in space! If its description ended here, there would probably already be a few years worth of booked stayings by now. But, there is a draw to the experience. Those who enter must spin a wheel to enter, which has a 100% chance of putting them into severe debt, which must be cleared before exiting.
Given that all the games are rigged to keep you gambling forever, a vacation to The Handsome Jackpot will inevitably turn into a permanent stay-cation. There’s barely any food. There is no sun. The giant trash city underneath is cool but probably not hygenic. The upside is that there are a lot of smaller communities (gangs) that visitors can spend the rest of their lives with.
1 New Vegas (Fallout: New Vegas)
Avoid At All Costs – Worse Than Las Vegas
- Things to Do: 1/10
- Food: 2/10
- Locals : 3/10
- Visuals: 3/10
If you’ve visited Las Vegas and thought it was grimey, New Vegas is on an entirely different level. Aside from the piles of trash and debris that litter the place, there is also radioactive pollution in the air! This also extends to the food, which is sure to contaminate you in some way, as most of it is hundreds of years old, and the current stuff is based on mutants.
Because of this, the vegetarian options are quite limited as a result. We definitely recommend the current Las Vegas, which will have marginally fewer diseases and a lot more to do.
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