VINNIE Jones says he still cries every day a year on from wife Tanya’s death – but has stayed off booze for her.
Tanya died of cancer aged 53 in July 2019 in Los Angeles and the hardman footballer-turned-actor, 55, said he still speaks to her every day.
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Hollywood action star Vinnie said: “I still cry every day. I’ve only just lost her. It’s the celebration of her life on Monday, and to be honest I hope I never stop crying. I’m not rolling around on the floor bawling my eyes out but what’s happened has brought out emotions in me that maybe I didn’t think I had …
“Most days I get up in the morning, I make my bed every day, I have a little chat with my wife and I get on with the day. It gives me a good start.
“She’s with me all the time, I know she is. I feel I’ve got a guiding hand on my shoulder. That’s how I’ll continue to live my life.”
Tanya was diagnosed with melanoma in 2013 but died in July after a brave six-year battle with three types of cancer.
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She and Vinnie were both treated for melanoma – but while he got the all-clear, the cruel disease spread through Tanya’s body.
Vinnie has been sober for over seven years and resisted drinking again after her death, knowing it would upset Tanya to see him back on the booze.
He told the Mirror: “After I lost my wife I think a lot of people thought I would go back to the drink, but I haven’t.
“In fact I’m even more positive about staying off alcohol because drink makes grief a lot heavier and more dramatic.
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“I’m in my eighth year dry, and I think that’s one of the biggest things that’s helped me through this.
“It’s so easy to try to look for something to ease the pain, but in reality it makes it worse, so I’ve stayed off it. My family are very proud that I never just jumped back and used it as an excuse.”
He added: “You’ve also got to realise your loved one would want you to carry on being successful. It would hurt them even more, it would make them more sad, if you curled up in bed all day.
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In the height of his grief last year Vinnie said he was counting the days until he could be reunited with his wife and he had bought the cemetery plot next to hers so their ashes would be buried together.
However, while opening up about his crippling grief last year, Vinnie was able to smile with pride as he recalled his wife’s strength.
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He told how, despite her illness, she fought on determined to be strong for her family – and maintained that courage even in her final days.
Vinnie has ruled out ever falling in love again, declaring: “She was the light of my life. I will never be with anyone else.”
