The picture you see above is an actual buttplug. But, it looks surprisingly like the silhouette of an avocado Stickeez toy that one Australian father saw upon coming home one day.
Greg Hughes, of Perth, bought the toy at department store Coles for his two daughters.
The sticky models are produced for Coles, and include a suction cup at the bottom. They’re all designed in the shape of vegetables and fruits with the aim being that they’ll encourage kids to eat more healthily.
The avocado one, though, appears to look a lot more X-rated than the others – at least from behind.
34-year-old Greg retold his experience of finding the toy stuck on his wall on his Facebook page, where he blogs at Dad Minus One.
He shares ‘the dizzying highs, the crippling lows and the mediocre middles from a dad’s perspective’, particularly from the perspective of a father who has lost a child (Greg’s son Riley died in 2015 of whooping cough).
There’s still plenty of room for laughs among the advice and emotional posts, however, as Greg’s hilarious rant about the Stickeez shows.
He said: ‘So being the good bloke I am, I decided to do the grocery shop at Coles for some of those sweet, sweet brownie points with the wife (also because then I’m in control of the snacks but that’s another story).
‘As I approach the checkout I see an opportunity to distract the kids when I realise they’re giving away Stickeez again and so I grab a handful on my way out. (For those non-Australians, Stickeez are small annoying fruit and veg collectables with suction caps on the bottom that strangely enough – stick to sh*t).
‘I hand them over to the kids, accept my praise and adoration as the greatest dad of all time and think nothing of it.
’30 minutes later when the kids have tired of their new toys and moved back to destroying my house I turn around and am a little taken aback by what I see…
‘There is a miniature butt plug stuck to my wall.’
Reader, it was not a butt plug.
Greg continued: ‘Upon further inspection, I realise it’s ‘allegedly’ an avocado but all I can say is that whoever designed these bad boys knew exactly what they were doing when they created this lad right here.
‘As I looked closer at my miniature suction capped sex toy that I’d inadvertently collected I drew inspiration and motivation from this little guy.
‘Sure he may spend his days as a piece of fruit and his nights surrounded by a**holes but look how goddamn happy he is doing it!
‘If that isn’t a shining example of exactly how we should all live our lives then I don’t know what is.
‘Even if you’re surrounded by a**holes and constantly getting chewed out – stay positive.’
He finished the post, saying, #belikeavocado.
Who knew we could feel so motivated reading a story about a children’s toy that looks like a sex toy.
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