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Phillip Schofield contemplated suicide as he came to terms with being gay as This Morning presenter praises family for ‘hauling him back’


Phillip Schofield has opened up about the effect coming to terms with his sexuality had on him (Picture: Rex Features)

Phillip Schofield has revealed during the lows of coming to terms with his sexuality he felt ‘hopeless’ and contemplated suicide – but it was his wife of 27 years Steph and their two daughters that ‘hauled him back’ from the brink.

Opening up about his sexuality and coming out as gay on Friday in an emotional Instagram statement, the This Morning presenter has revealed the torment he faced as he tried to suppress his feelings.

Plunged into a dangerous depression, he insists the strength of his loving wife, 55, and daughters Molly, 26, and Ruby, 24, is the reason he’s here to tell his story and help others.

‘There is no doubt living with this kind of secret can take people to the darkest of places,’ the 57-year-old told The Sun On Sunday. ‘And there is no question for me it got very dark, because it felt hopeless.’

He continued: ‘There is no question, in those moments, when I couldn’t see a way forward, it was Steph and my girls — through their strength — who hauled me back.

‘But I understand completely why so many men and women in this country get to the point of suicide.

‘I had Steph and I had my girls and I don’t think I could have left them like that. But if I hadn’t have had their support, then who knows?’

Phil, with wife Steph, has praised his loving family (Picture: Rex Features)

Phil said it got to a stage he had to come out as the stress of keeping this to himself was becoming too damaging, revealing his family noticed a change in the bubbly presenter, saying he became ‘very, very quiet, very down and locked into myself’ through the depression.

The popular presenter broke down on This Morning during a chat with co-host Holly Willoughby, heaping praise on Steph for her support.

During an emotional appearance the dad-of-two opened up about his sexuality for the first time before he later revealed he knew he was gay on his wedding day to Steph, as he continued to thank his family for helping him through the inner turmoil of coming out.

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‘I have had to deal with this in my head for quite some time and as for Steph, as I said I can’t write in any statement how I feel about that woman,’ he added on Friday. ‘She is incredible, there is no one in my life that would have supported me in the way she has. She is astonishing.’

He also confirmed he is single, and plans to stay that way for the near future.

Discussing whether he was looking for a partner, he continued: ‘No, I don’t think so. No, I’m not thinking there.

‘I’m doing each day at a time now and this has always been a slow process. There is no fast process after this. This is the big day and this is the day I knew everything was pointing towards.’



Phillip Schofield coming out statement in full

‘You never know what’s going on in someone’s seemingly perfect life, what issues they are struggling with, or the state of their wellbeing – and so you won’t know what has been consuming me for the last few years. With the strength and support of my wife and my daughters, I have been coming to terms with the fact that I am gay.

‘This is something that has caused many heartbreaking conversations at home. I have been married to Steph for nearly 27 years, and we have two beautiful grown-up daughters, Molly and Ruby.

‘My family have held me so close: they have tried to cheer me up, to smother me with kindness and love, despite their own confusion. Yet I still can’t sleep and there have been some very dark moments.

‘My inner conflict contrasts with an outside world that has changed so very much for the better. Today, quite rightly, being gay is a reason to celebrate and be proud. Yes, I am feeling pain and confusion, but that only comes from the hurt I am causing for my family.

‘Steph has been incredible – I love her so very much. She is the kindest soul that I have ever met. My girls have been astonishing in their love, hugs and encouraging and words of comfort. Both mine and Steph’s entire families have stunned me with their love, instant acceptance and support. Of course they are worried about Steph, but I know they will scoop us both up.

‘My friends are the best, especially Holly, who has been so kind and wise – and who has hugged me as I sobbed on her shoulder. At ITV, I couldn’t hope to work with more wonderful, supportive teams.

‘Every day on This Morning, I sit in awe of those we meet who have been brave and open in confronting their truth – so now it’s my turn to share mine.

‘This will probably all come as something as a surprise and I understand, but only by facing this, by being honest, can I hope to find peace in my mind and a way forward. Please be kind, especially to my family. Phillip.’

MORE: Holly Willoughby supported Phillip Schofield’s wife before he came out as gay

MORE: Phillip Schofield’s mum breaks silence after ‘brave and inspiring’ son announces he’s gay





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