Nintendo’s latest mobile game looks amazing but how does Mario Kart Tour play, and how bad are the microtransactions?
Ignoring Pokémon, Nintendo’s history with mobile phone games began in 2016 with the slightly bland avatar village Miitomo, followed in the same year by Super Mario Run. That was an interesting experiment, because although it was free to try the game asked for a one-off payment of £10 to be yours forever. Although it was widely downloaded, it wasn’t the banker Nintendo had hoped for, which is why 2017’s Fire Emblem Heroes adopted a very different strategy.
Heroes substituted a straightforward single payment for the familiar free-to-play model, where the game is free to download but laden with gacha mechanics. It also fell back on that old mobile favourite of needing energy to start battles, which recharged very slowly but could also be purchased for actual cash. That proved to be a runaway success, and thus Nintendo’s approach to mobile was set in stone.
What followed – Animal Crossing: Pocket Camp, Dragalia Lost, and Dr. Mario World – applied the same tawdry methods of milking players for cash, whilst spinning out long term games loosely based on famous Nintendo characters and IP. The apps are united by several factors, most obvious of which is that player skill had far less to do with success than pure grind. And almost all feature random loot boxes, known in the trade as Skinner boxes, or operant conditioning chambers, for their ability to inspire psychological addiction.
All of which neatly leads us to the release of Mario Kart Tour, which leverages one of Nintendo’s crown jewels and one of the biggest brands so far to make the leap to mobile. Based on Nintendo’s brief but disappointing touchscreen track record it may not be that surprising to find gacha, multiple currencies, and a game that’s focused on ratcheting up levels and currencies rather than the joy of racing cartoon go-karts.
Set across a range of tracks from the series, from the SNES original to more recent outings (although sadly none of Mario Kart 8’s anti-gravity antics) your job is to win races through a mixture of good driving and judicious use of weapons. Along with all the familiar power-ups there are also now character-specific abilities, with Diddy Kong, for example, using Banana Barrels that are essentially banana skin machineguns.
You steer by sliding your thumb left and right, hurl an item forwards by tapping or sliding upwards, and drop an item by sliding downwards. However, your kart continually accelerates without your input, so you don’t have to worry about that. As in most Mario Kart games, you can use power slides to give yourself a brief turbo boost when you straighten up. Hold the drift for long enough and you get a slightly longer boost indicated by the sparks from your kart’s wheels turning orange, and finally pink for the longest possible boost.
You’ll also be collecting power-ups from the usual spinning cubes hovering over the track, in two-lap races that don’t last long enough to get boring, but also don’t offer much in the way of gameplay. Steering lacks the series’ trademark precision, your kart’s trajectory feeling oddly on-rails at times, with invisible barriers keeping you on the track when you would otherwise be ploughing a furrow through the grass or plunging into the sunny abyss.
There are occasional shortcuts, which are clearly flagged, but for the most part races depend on the power-ups you collect and the racer you’ve chosen. This is particularly important because you’re strongly incentivised to use specific karts, hang-gliders, and drivers on particular courses, with bonuses including increased race points for combos – completing a series of actions like taking jumps or shooting other drivers – to offering multiple weapons each time you collect a question mark. Naturally, taking advantage of all those bonuses involves unlocking more karts and characters.
Everything looks and sounds lovely, the colourful drivers and scenery really popping on a high-resolution screen. It also sounds great, the music and sparkly sound effects working their usual magic. The issue is that it’s all superficial, the game itself comprising little more than an opportunity to earn points that gradually level up your drivers, karts, and hang-gliders, which in turn let you earn even more points per race.
Points are converted to Grand Stars at the end of each round, which let you unlock more championships. You also earn gold coins to buy new drivers and karts in the shop, and a slow drip feed of rubies, which you can also buy for real money. They allow you access to Coin Rush, to get more gold, and the warp pipe – Mario Kart Tour’s take on loot boxes, which offers up random new drivers. That’s also the reason this game isn’t available in Belgium, which recently outlawed the sale of loot boxes in video games.
Perhaps the most mystifying element though is the Gold Pass, a £4.99 monthly subscription allowing access to the 200cc racing class, which gives the highest payout of points, and the most testing races. You also get gold badges earned by completing exclusive challenges, but even before Apple Arcade’s release that would have represented poor value. Post-Apple Arcade it’s unimaginably terrible. With Mario Kart Tour a fiver buys you slightly less dull races for a month, with Apple Arcade you get a hundred mostly excellent, highly varied, and often quite lengthy games.
And what’s the point of earning more in a game that puts so little value on your skill as a gamer, and instead merely tests your patience and willingness to spend money? The extra characters and karts you acquire don’t lead anywhere more interesting, and you still can’t access the most exciting races without continuing to pay for the privilege. It doesn’t even have multiplayer, the very lifeblood of Mario Kart, although Nintendo promises this will be added at some point.
With so much more going on in the Google Play and Apple App stores, opening yourself up to Mario Kart Tour’s sinister psychological tricks feels almost wilfully self-destructive. A great many mobile games are developed on the basis of never giving a sucker an even break: if people are willing to spend money on vapid mechanics designed purely to exploit them then most games companies will happily take their money. In the past, that would have been anathema to Nintendo. It still should be, but here we are.
If you’re looking for a mindless time sink there are many more satisfying options available and if you want to play Mario Kart get yourself a Switch. Nintendo’s reputation outside mobile remains intact. On a touchscreen, they’ve become a publisher you should give a wide birth.
Mario Kart Tour review summary
In Short: A good looking but shallow repurposing of Nintendo’s classic kart racers, transforming it form the world’s favourite racing game to a cynical, and disturbingly persistent, cash grab.
Pros: It looks and sounds lovely, and the sense of steady progression and constant upgrades proves as addictive ever.
Cons: Loot boxes, a grossly over-priced monthly subscription, no multiplayer mode, imprecise handling, invisible barriers, and the favouring of levelling up over player skill.
Score: 3/10
Formats: iOS (reviewed) and Android
Price: £Free to download, Gold Pass £4.99 per month
Publisher: Nintendo
Developer: Nintendo EPD
Release Date: 25th September 2019
Age Rating: 4+
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