Parenting

June to share mum’s birthday month and December to maximise paternity leave – why we planned our kids’ birthdays


PICKING when to start trying for a baby can be a difficult decision.

Couples usually ask themselves questions like, “Are we financially stable?” and: “Are we in a happy place in our relationship?”

 Katie saw son Mason struggle with social skills at school as he was an August baby

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Katie saw son Mason struggle with social skills at school as he was an August babyCredit: Bournemouth News

But there are less obvious considerations. This month, the parenting guidebook What Works? called for kids born in the summer to have their marks adjusted to make up for the disadvantage of being the youngest in their year.

Those born between June and August underperform compared to older classmates and are more likely to have special educational requirements and low self-esteem. For years, parents who place a strong emphasis on the academic success of their children have admitted to planning the exact time of year they wanted to give birth, making sure their children are among the oldest in the school year. There are other reasons for planning so meticulously.

Here, three women who plotted the birth of their children to the month reveal all about their best-laid plans.

‘I really wanted him around to help with our first child’

LIFEGUARD Clare Brooke and her husband Matthew, 44, a delivery driver, live in Bramley, Leeds, with their children Summer, seven, and Jacob, ten. Clare, 40, says:

“MATTHEW and I got married in 2004. We are both big forward-planners and set goals for each year, so when it came to having a family, we wanted everything to be perfect.

 Clare planned the birth month of her first child around husband Matthew's paternity leave

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Clare planned the birth month of her first child around husband Matthew’s paternity leaveCredit: Glen Minikin

“Matthew is a pharmaceutical delivery driver, which means long hours and limited holiday.

“I really wanted him around to help with our first child as much as possible and he knew he’d struggle to be home much if he was working. That’s when we came up with the Christmas baby idea.

“Over Christmas, his work gets very quiet and he gets around two weeks’ holiday.

“We realised if we paired this time with his two weeks’ paternity leave and our baby was born in early December, he would get almost six weeks off if we added in a couple of holiday days as well.

“I talked to my GP and researched conception times. It took meticulous planning and between February 1 and March 30, 2008, I wore my poor husband out in the bedroom. But it worked!

 'Between February 1 and March 30, I wore my poor husband out in the bedroom', admits Clare

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‘Between February 1 and March 30, I wore my poor husband out in the bedroom’, admits ClareCredit: Glen Minikin

“I conceived our son Jacob in March and he was born on December 2.

“Matthew was there to see him born and took his two weeks of paternity leave.

“He then had some days with no deliveries over Christmas and had the bank holidays, meaning almost six weeks at home helping out.

“It made Christmas super-special as lots of relatives had time off to visit. I needed that support as a first-time mum.

“When we decided on a second baby, we chose June – my own birth month – so we could combine our celebrations during the summer holidays.

“It worked perfectly. Summer was born on June 27, 2012. It saves us money and makes the school holidays extra-special.”

‘Seeing my son struggle with social skills at the start of school was hard’

KATIE DAVIES, a management consultant, lives in Poole, Dorset, with husband Matthew, 29, a promotions consultant, son Mason, six, and daughter Nancy, eleven months. Kate, 26, says:

“WHETHER it is our meals throughout the week or my career, I have always been a planner. So when we decided to have our first child, that was nothing new.

 Katie and Matthew's son Mason was the youngest in his school year - so he was smaller and couldn't read or write yet

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Katie and Matthew’s son Mason was the youngest in his school year – so he was smaller and couldn’t read or write yetCredit: Bournemouth News

“I had read lots about planning a pregnancy, including how being one of the oldest children in the school year helps your child academically.

“For that reason, I decided to begin trying for a baby at the start of December. I figured we would try for a few months, then I would fall pregnant and we would have a baby in September, October or November.

“I couldn’t believe it when I fell pregnant within weeks! I was so happy to be pregnant and couldn’t wait to be a mum but it meant Mason was born in August 2014, making him the YOUNGEST in his year at school.

“When he started school, he was smaller than the others and I was shocked that some children in his class were already reading and writing, while Mason was nowhere near that. When we decided to have a second child, this time I took my planning very seriously. I tracked my ovulation dates obsessively using tips from websites, and didn’t start trying until February.

 For their second child, Katie and Matthew didn't start trying until February

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For their second child, Katie and Matthew didn’t start trying until FebruaryCredit: Bournemouth News

“It worked and Nancy was conceived last year in March. She arrived four weeks early on November 10, 2018.

“Seeing Mason struggle with social skills at the start of school was hard and I feel so relieved that Nancy will have a head-start when she begins her education.

“My husband and I would do anything to help our children have the best start in life.
It’s not just about school grades. It is starting life confident and with the best opportunities.

“I know Nancy will find it easier to learn and be more mature when she puts on her school uniform. Planning when you give birth is important, for parents and for children. For us, it’s worked.”

‘Star signs have been a huge guidance to me’

ADMIN ASSISTANT Terri Wilkins lives in Wellingborough, Northants, with partner Ronald James, 37, an electrician. Terri, 31, says:

“I’VE always been interested in star signs. The predictions have been a huge guidance to me.

 Terri, who is a Virgo, knew Ronald was The One when he revealed his star sign was Sagittarius

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Terri, who is a Virgo, knew Ronald was The One when he revealed his star sign was SagittariusCredit: Paul Tonge – The Sun

“I learnt how important it is to surrounded yourself with people who complement your star sign and when I’ve visited psychics, they have always used horoscopes to help advise me.

“I met Ron through friends last October and fancied him from the moment we got chatting. I didn’t wait long to ask him what his star sign is and when he said Sagittarius, I knew he was The One.

“I’m a Virgo and everything tells you how well that personality type matches mine. I’m an earth sign and Ron’s a fire sign, which means we are very well balanced. We got engaged within three months.

“By March, we knew we wanted a baby. We talked about trying straight away but my first thought was the baby’s star sign. I know Pisces are empathetic and strongly intuitive, which is exactly what I wanted from my first child.

 Terri wanted a Pisces baby because of the sign's empathy and intuition

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Terri wanted a Pisces baby because of the sign’s empathy and intuitionCredit: Paul Tonge – The Sun

“Virgos like me also click well with Pisces and it was so important for my first child to be a good fit for the family.

“We both have Pisces friends who have had a significant impact on our lives and I once visited a psychic who told me I’d have a water-sign baby.

“I couldn’t ignore that. I found a conception website that gave advice and charted my ovulation times using a fertility app.

“It told me to start trying in April and stop in early May, giving me a window of five days to have as much sex as possible.

“We did exactly that. It meant a lot of sex but both our star signs are hot in the bedroom.

“By the end of May, I tested positive. I couldn’t believe it and when my GP confirmed my due date was February 20, I cried with joy.

“Pisces babies are born between February 19 and March 20, meaning even if I go over term I will still have my Pisces water baby.”

“I’m four months pregnant now. We are currently researching baby names and looking at famous people who are Pisces.

“Star signs have thousands of years of history.

“It’s amazing I get my dream child.”

Liam Payne explains why he has missed son Bear’s birthday and key moments in his life as he admits being a dad is ‘hard’





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