I am a 58-year-old lesbian. Since the menopause, I have not had any sexual feelings: masturbation doesn’t work and I don’t get wet any more and am very upset about it. The only kind of arousal I feel is during fantasies about a Hollywood actress on whom I have the most massive crush. My GP suggested testosterone, which horrified me. Is there anything I can do to restore my sexual feelings?
I can understand your reticence about using a hormonal agent – many others feel the same way. Perhaps it seems unnatural, or you are worried that supplementary testosterone could have side-effects. In your situation, though, I really recommend you take your GP’s advice. As women age, we produce less of the important hormones that are present earlier in life – notably oestrogen and testosterone – that enhance sex and make it comfortable. When oestrogen is lacking, a woman does not experience the same level of lubrication as a preparation for sex. Testosterone is also an important sex hormone for men and women, and if it is not at an optimum level for a woman she will have diminished sexual desire. Talk to your GP again, ask all the important questions you have about safety and side-effects and make up your mind in the full understanding of your options.
•Pamela Stephenson Connolly is a US-based psychotherapist who specialises in treating sexual disorders.
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