Name: James Catmur
Age: 59
Job: Risk consultant
Income: £31,000 (insurance payouts, some earnings and benefits)
Watching my wife die from motor neurone disease three years ago has affected the way I look at life. Helen ended up lying in bed and only able to move her right hand and eyes; she spoke by typing into an iPad. She researched assisted dying in Switzerland but it was too late. In the end she stopped using the ventilator she had become dependent on to breathe. Three days later she died. She was 57. On one level she was at peace but the three months before that were absolutely miserable.
I have multiple sclerosis (MS) and am slowly becoming more disabled. I can walk up and down the stairs but it’s slow and painful. I tend to use a wheelchair when I’m out. After what Helen went through, I’ve decided to plan my own death. I want to ensure that should my health deteriorate to a point where I am suffering unbearably and where a prolonged, distressing death is likely, I want to be able to take control. Because assisted dying is currently illegal in the UK, I have decided to join Dignitas. It’s about £80 a year plus an initial fee of £200. In total, it’ll cost me about £10,000 to visit the clinic in Switzerland. My children, who are aged 18 and 17, know I’m going and are totally supportive. They saw what mum went through.
I work part-time as a risk consultant, typically spending two to three hours a week on the role and earning several thousand pounds a year. My main source of income is my wife’s life insurance. We received a critical illness payout of £95,000 at the time and we spent half of it modifying the house, such as building an accessible bedroom and bathroom downstairs and creating a ramp for her wheelchair. Her life insurance pays out £1,400 a month until my 18-year-old son turns 21. That is what we live off.
Applying for life insurance was easy; you provide the death certificate and you get it. Applying for government benefits is very different. Some forms you have to fill in are pages and pages long. It’s miserable as a system – they make it so hard.
I have a series of little pots of money coming in. Every month I receive £120 in child benefit and about £600 from my wife’s pension, although that will stop in 2020 when child benefit stops. I also receive personal independence payment which is about £200 a month, as well as child tax credit which comes to £4,300 for this year and will also stop in 2020.
I’m very frugal; some people might describe me as mean. I’m fortunate I do have money. I used to work as a management consultant and I always saved. I built nest eggs of money which are now essential.
There are no big outgoings. We bought our property a long time ago and are mortgage-free. Physically I can’t do much in the way of trips which means I don’t spend much, although my daughter and I recently visited the theatre in London. I
My biggest expenditure is probably food and petrol. I mainly eat in. I wouldn’t say I’m a fussy eater but I don’t eat frozen or tinned goods, or goods made in a factory.
I think charitable giving is important. My wife and I always tried to give away 10% of our income. I give to the MND Association, MS Society, MS Trust and Macmillan Cancer Support, as my mother-in-law died from cancer.
The fact that I will need to be physically able to travel to Switzerland means I may have to end my life before we are truly ready. This is an upsetting reality of the UK’s ban on assisted dying. If the option was available here, I would be able to live longer and say my goodbyes when the time is right for me. I might make it to 65. I do not know. But I’m preparing now so I can avoid suffering and make sure the children are comfortable.
Dignity in Dying campaigns for greater choice, control and access to services at the end of life, including the option of assisted dying for terminally ill, mentally competent adults. For more information, visit www.dignityindying.org.uk
