I’m 21 years old and earlier this year, I moved in with Evelyn, a 92-year-old lady who had lived alone since her son died. She had a spare room and wanted someone to live with her for company and help with odd jobs.
I had just been accepted onto my masters in creative writing and publishing, and wanted a home where I could make a friend – but also build a home-life in a city that felt new and overwhelming, without paying unaffordable rent typical of big cities.
Living with an elderly woman is one of the best decisions I’ve ever made, and Evelyn and I have lots in common.
She has a good sense of humour, we’re both into period dramas and we watch Strictly Come Dancing together every Saturday night – she for the costumes and I for the dances.
We have a shared weakness when it comes to shopping, and always discourage each other when the contents of our baskets get ridiculous.
Evelyn is also able to give me advice on where to visit, since she knows the area well, and the outings we’ve gone on are fun and have helped me familiarise myself with the city.
During my first few weeks we took the train down to Blackfriars Bridge, walked across and perused all the artwork at the Tate Modern. It was nice to have someone to ooh and ah and play the art critic with. Wednesdays are now usually our big day out.
It’s impossible not to become good friends when you live and spend as much time together as we do with each other, but I also believe I got lucky with Evelyn.
We have a relationship of mutual respect and care, and we both have someone to look out for the other when we’re feeling down or under the weather.
In many ways, our different backgrounds complement each other. For instance, I like music but have no knowledge of it, while Evelyn is an expert pianist.
What I help with, however, is the more technical side of things: resetting the wifi, finding specific apps and programs on her smart TV and ordering or searching for things online, and I’m not half bad as a cook. Just as well, I suppose, since I cook us dinner four times a week.
Living with someone from an older generation has been an invaluable experience, and one that I would recommend, because older people have a lot of knowledge and expertise to dispense.
What’s more, unlike those of my peers, our house is never dark, cold or empty when I return and there is always someone there to ask me about my day.
It improves the quality of life for both of us, because company and conversation are vital for mental health. This is particularly true during the coming months, when the weather gets colder and there’s not much else to do but stay inside.
You’re also more likely to cook lavish meals and go out on day trips if you have that all important ‘partner-in-crime’ and can share a good laugh.
We’ve had a fantastic close to the year by decorating the house with baubles and handmade paper chains. We also brought out the mince pies and Christmas crackers and ventured down to a local Yuletide Fayre to celebrate the festive season with a bang!
What I want others to take away from this my experience is that yes, this type of arrangement takes time, organisation and consistency but, it can really change your and someone else’s life for the better.
I’m really grateful to have Evelyn in my life and hope that 2020 will be an even better year for us.
Share my Home is a nationwide service that matches older householders with younger companions for the mutual benefits of shared living. You can sign up on the website or call 07561155855. Homeshare UK is the network for all Homeshare organisations.
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