Parenting

Husband asks why wife hasn’t lost weight after giving birth just two months ago


Needless to say, commenters were not happy (Picture: Mmuffin)

After giving birth, the absolute last thing on your mind should be your weight.

In general, women are pressured to shed their ‘baby weight’ once they’ve had a child, and seeing celebrity ‘success stories’ on the pages of glossy magazines likely doesn’t help.

It gives the idea that your body will automatically bounce back after pregnancy (slyly omitting the celebs’ nannies, personal trainers, and cleaners), or that it even matters whether it does.

One woman on forum Mumsnet posted about her extremely sad experience with this just this week.

The user made her post on the ‘Am I Being Unreasonable?’ part of the site, which is commonly used for venting problems and finding out whether people’s reactions are irrational or understandable.

She told of how she had been with her husband for around five years, and given birth to her baby two months ago. During pregnancy, she’d put on around 3 stone 6, but managed to drop 2 stone since.

Her partner had been known to go on the Instagrams of ‘skinny’ women, and was caught messaging a woman saying how nice her arms were. However, it was his comment to his wife that riled the internet most – and for good reason.

The poster said: He said ‘I have a question. You lost all the fat and weight in the past for your ex. Why don’t you love me enough to do it for me?’

‘I was in shock and could not believe what I heard. In the past I had lost a lot of weight before I dated him, but that was early twenties and I ate nothing and was miserable all the time…that’s not a fair comparison.

‘I was in tears and told him that’s not fair. And he said it again. Why don’t I love him enough to lose the weight I gained.

‘It been a terrible night. I’ve been crying and he doesn’t care. Said if we didn’t have a child he would be sleeping at a hotel.’

The post goes on to explain how she believed her husband’s love wouldn’t be conditional on a weight gain – particularly while carrying a whole human being – and how her confidence was completely knocked by the comments.

Thankfully, commenters stepped in to let her know she definitely was not being unreasonable.

One said: ‘I bet you could lose 80Kg of unwanted flesh by tossing him out the window’, while another quipped: ‘Seeing as he gets on so great with skinny women tell him to piss off with them.’

Many people suggested that the user not be so hard on herself and realise that looking after a baby is hard enough work, without worrying about how slim you are.

Perhaps it’ll take this woman’s husband creating a brand new person and sustaining its life to get his head around the fact that a few stretch marks or belly rolls really don’t mean a single thing.

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