Fresh from her turn as Backstage Show Host at the Brits, the ever-gorgeous Radio 1 DJ, Clara Amfo chats to GLAMOUR from her home in Hackney for this week’s My Glamifesto For Life.
From who she turns to get the perfect eyebrows to her pride and passion for her Ghanian heritage (and the national dish, jollof rice) to how she has learnt to cope with losing her father in 2015.
She also shares powerful words about the importance of self-belief and self-love – and her empowering habit of talking to herself in the mirror on down days – inspired by Issa Rae.
“So any day when I’m feeling like sh*t I will talk to myself loudly in the mirror, and be like, ‘Clara, fix up. You’re a baddie.’”
Because, as she quite rightly – and awesomely – states: “The only person that can truly cheerlead you in the best possible way, outside of your friends and family, is you. If you don’t bet on yourself, who else is going to?”
What is your daily mantra?
My daily mantra is: “this too shall pass”. I really learnt that on a really good day and on a really bad day, equally, this too shall pass. And with that, I really try and savour my good days because I know they may not last forever. But then I really try and detach myself from my bad days and understand that I know this may hurt, I know this may be frustrating, but it’s going to pass. I think it makes you remember to savour what’s good, but also to ease through what’s bad.
What is your instant mood booster?
Dancing and singing around my kitchen. I’ve definitely found, especially during lockdown – I call it the “panna cotta” that’s my favourite nickname for the pandemic – but during the panna cotta I’ve just been freeing up myself by just dancing and just moving my body, it’s almost like inner child therapy. I think there’s a real sweet spot of, especially when you’re under 10, just not giving a damn what anybody thinks. There’s a liberation that you have that I think you lose as you get older, and I think you’re desperate to kind of get it back. For me, my kind of mood booster is just always trying to savour that fun feeling of being seven years old and just not caring what anybody thought of me.
How do you manage your mental health?
I dance, I sing badly, I ride my bike. I cycled to work this morning and it made me feel amazing, so I think any kind of movement or anything where I can be loud alone, that’s me. I also have no shame being loud in front of people, especially my close friends. With the lockdown restrictions easing, I had dinner with my mates for the first time in forever it seems. And we were just cackling the venue down. We were given hot water bottles just because it was so freezing outside. But obviously everyone’s at that point though, you don’t care as long as you get to meet your friend, and even be outside being like, “Oh, I’m having such a great time,” while you’re cradling your cocktail. But even just getting to do that and celebrate that by just being noisy and potentially a bit tipsy was really fun.
What do you most value in your friendships?
Honesty, consistency, and vulnerability. I think those are things that make my friendships thrive. I think the deepest connections I have with people are where we are completely ourselves and that’s the good, the bad and the ugly. And that’s sharing the not so great sides of yourself, that’s sharing those fears, sharing those secrets. Because friendships are there for healing, aren’t they? As well as laughs!
What are you most looking forward to when all this is over post the pandemic?
I can’t wait to go raving again, I miss going to the club so badly! Just any kind of outdoor music thing I just can’t wait to get back to. I love going to the cinema, whether it’s on my own or with mates. That was always one of my favourite Sunday rituals, just going and eating overpriced popcorn in a room with strangers, but I love it. And I want to travel, I love to travel. And also I want to meet my nephew. My brother had a child and he’s in Ireland, so I haven’t had a chance to meet him.
What makes you feel glam?
I feel glam when my eyebrows are good. I’ll happily wear no makeup as long as my eyebrows are on. Actually, as long as I’ve got a lip gloss on and I’m moisturized, I’m good. So I was fortunate enough to get my eyebrows micro bladed by this incredible eyebrow artist called Rachel Pitman, she does a lot of really vital work with cancer survivors. And she’s got a degree in fine arts so she does incredible nipples to women who’ve had mastectomies and incredible lifelike eyebrows. She did these babies two years ago and I don’t have to do anything to them. So big up to Rachel.
What is the quirkiest thing you do in the name of wellness?
I talk to myself out loud. There’s a show that I’m obsessed with called Insecure which stars the incredible Issa Rae. And throughout the series, there’s bits where she’s talking to herself in the mirror and sometimes her reflection talks back, then she raps to herself. I’m not quite there with the rapping yet, but you know, she’ll be like, “You’re bad, you’re …” And I’m like, come on because we’ve all got our down days, we’ve all got our days where we don’t feel the greatest. And the only person that can truly cheerlead you in the best possible way, outside of your friends and family, is you. If you don’t bet on yourself, who else is going to?
We live in a society that likes to punish us [women] for any kinds of sense of agency that we may have over ourselves and any joy we want to feel. And it’s just like, listen, you got to bet on yourself, man. So any day when I’m feeling like sh*t I will talk to myself loudly in the mirror, and be like, “Clara, fix up. You’re a baddie.”
What is your getting ready song right now?
I’ve just got very varied taste in music. I can listen to anything from Barbra Streisand soul tunes, to the roadest of road rap, to flipping Dua Lipa, to this band I love called The Internet. Whatever makes me feel good in the moment… I’ve been listening to Beyonce, Coachella, the live album [a lot]. It’s incredible. It is a masterclass on how to perform and how to perform music live. We all know Beyonce is incredible, but to do a show like that and to have that kind of control over your voice with that level of choreography. And the way that she did that sort of tribute to HBCUs, which stands for historical Black college universities. And the whole tradition of the live marching bands. I remember before lockdown I went round to Grimmy’s [Nick Grimshaw] house, because he’s my neighbour. And me and his boyfriend and our mate, Yasmin Evans, who’s on 1Xtra, because Grimmy’s boyfriend’s a dancer, we all tried to learn the choreography and we completely flopped. So that album’s got a lot of good memories to me, and gets you in a good mood.
What makes you most proud of your heritage?
Our warmth, and I say “our”, I’m talking about Ghanaian people. I am from Ghana, and the Ghanaian mantra and motto is ‘Akwaaba’ which means you’re welcome. Even my welcome mat at my door, it has Akwaaba written three times. And Ghanaian people, they’re just known for their warmth and their hospitality.
And I think also the food, Ghanaian food is incredible. There’s a dish called jollof rice, which is the national dish. It’s come like Nando’s spicy rice but 10 times better. No shade to Nando’s, we love you obviously. But it’s like that. And the music, I mean look, there’s so many amazing creative people that’s come out Ghana. I mean, shout out to Stormzy. But there’s just such a rich culture of music, architecture, and art.
What is your biggest passion?
I think my biggest passion, I guess on a spiritual level, is the pursuit of happiness. I’m passionate about living a life that I enjoy. I enjoy music and art and all types of culture and enjoying people and being happy with myself and my surroundings.
What or who could you not live without?
I think I’ve learned, through losing somebody very close to me [her father, who died in 2015], that even though it’s painful you do learn to live without people because they never really leave you.
And what I’ve learned is that even though it’s painful and oh my God, it’s the worst pain ever losing somebody close to you, something happens where you do find the will to carry on because it’s because you know they’re with you. Which some people may not believe in and that’s okay, that’s just what I believe in. And on a completely superficial level, when it comes to food, I couldn’t live without a good slice of red velvet cake at least once a month.
What is the best way to clap back against misogyny?
It’s to carry on doing what I’m doing without giving a f*ck, and to do it unapologetically. Misogyny is so deep rooted and so systemic. I look forward to the day where I don’t have to be asked this question. I look forward to the day when we don’t have to protest for basic things, even things like the whole issue on period poverty.
Who’s the biggest inspiration in your life?
I would say my mum. And it’s interesting because she has grown into that for me because she’s always been inspirational, I just didn’t realize how much so until I became an alleged adult myself. Because I think when we’re kids, our parents are these superheroes. And then I think particularly for young women, I can only speak for myself anyway, there was this phase your mum also being public enemy number one. I think I did have a bit of a disconnect with my mum for a while. I love her so much and there was never a question of me being loved or whatever, but I just felt like we were on two different planets because we’re like chalk and cheese. I’m realizing now how similar we are in some ways.
How do you deal with failure?
I have really learned to deal with failure by truly understanding and truly believing the phrase “what’s meant for you won’t pass you by”. I think one of the worst things you can be, well I think in life and particularly in my industry, is entitled. And I’ve seen it happen, people think, well I should be doing this, this, that, that, and that. And of course we’ve all got hopes, we’ve all got goals, and we’ve all got dreams, but not everything’s meant for you. And that’s okay. And that’s not to say that you shouldn’t fight for stuff.
What would your advice be to anyone trying to aspire in your field?
I would always say do it for the work, not for the perks. I am so fortunate to have a life that I love and a career that I love because I was obsessive doing work that I’m proud of. And I think, particularly in the media world and broadcasting and in presenting, I think people just see or, I think, or are attracted to just the idea of being visible. It’s all about being seen and being visible, and it’s not.
It should be about doing work that you’re proud of, not everybody just dashing you 50,000 likes on your picture and being like, oh my God, I think you’re this, oh, can I get a selfie? And don’t be afraid of some hard work and don’t be afraid of rejection. And just be ready to work for little to no money for a long time. It’s character building.
Where do you want to be in five years from now?
I will always be wanting to do a radio show that I love. In five years from now, I want to be producing TV shows that I really care about, and developing new talent. And I want to know how to be able to cook a great meal without giving any of my friends food poisoning.
What would you want your legacy to be?
On a personal level, I would want my legacy to be, she was a good friend, an honest friend, a loyal friend, sister, daughter, colleague. She was a laugh. And on a professional level, she did great work that kept me company, and made me think, and made me smile.
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