Name: Balmoral style.
Age: Ageless.
Appearance: Conservative and rebellious.
I don’t understand how something can be both. You know, like our late queen, Elizabeth II.
I never really thought of her as rebellious, to be honest. Also “versatile and individual” according to Miu Miu.
Miu Miu? The Italian fashion brand, founded by Miuccia Prada, which has just launched a new range named after the queen’s Scottish summer retreat, Balmoral.
What kind of stuff? The usual: Argyle knits, waxed jackets, brogues, walking boots, kilts and tweed bags.
Seriously? Does that not sound like the queen’s summer wardrobe to you?
It does and that’s a big part of the problem I’m having. That’s fashion – all styles, however unlikely, eventually come due for reassessment.
But she only died two years ago … Like it or not, the queen’s look is now the look. As Miu Miu puts it: “A sense of history, of passed [sic] times drives the fresh, fashionable and new.”
How can a waxed jacket be fashion? Put it on a skinny model.
OK, fine. But if I really want this kind of gear, I can get it from any respectable farm supply retail outlet. And now you can also get it from Miu Balmoral pop-up shops that will soon be opening in Tokyo, Osaka, Shanghai, Bangkok, Hong Kong and Seoul.
I see: it’s classic British dowdiness recast as high fashion for foreign markets. In this case maybe, but the queen has always informed fashion. Designers such as Vivienne Westwood, Alessandro Michele and John Galliano were all inspired by her.
I’ll take your word for it. Even her dogs became fashionable. In the weeks after she died internet searches for corgis increased tenfold and the price of puppies shot up.
What else is big in Balmoral style? If you’re trying to get the authentic look, you could do worse than a handcrafted goat’s hair sporran modelled on those worn by Balmoral castle ghillies in the 19th century: £490 from the House of Labhran.
I don’t even know enough about Scottish fashion to know whether that’s a lot for a sporran. In an emergency you can pick one up for less than £50, but the goat’s hair ones tend to be pricey.
What about a horse? Will I need some of kind horse? Maybe hire one for the weekend first, to see how you like it.
Do say: “These shoes are lovely, but do you have anything browner and sturdier?”
Don’t say: “When I say my personal fashion icon is the queen, I mean Camilla.”