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Agender alien wants to give hope to other people who feel different


Jareth Nebula identifies as an agender alien (Picture: PA Real Life)

Jareth Nebula previously identified as a transgender man. Now they are an agender alien.

Jareth, 33, was assigned female at birth and changed their name and transitioned when they were 29.

Now, they no longer identify as belonging to any human gender, instead believing they are an alien stuck in human form.

Jareth said that in an ideal world people would call them ‘thing’ or ‘it’ rather than using the ‘he’ pronoun. Throughout this article we’ll use the gender neutral ‘they’, as Jareth identifies as agender.

If the name Jareth sounds familiar, that’s because the alien named themself after David Bowie’s character in the 1986 film Labyrinth. The Nebula bit describes a space cloud.

‘After coming out as transgender and believing I had finally found myself, I realised I was wrong – I wasn’t male or female, or even human,’ says Jareth.

‘I don’t think or feel like humans. I can’t really explain it to others – I’m simply otherworldly.

Jareth following top surgery (Picture: PA Real Life)

‘I didn’t feel comfortable as either gender or even anything in between. I know I’m stuck in a human form and that’s how I’m perceived by others – but to me, I’m an alien with no gender.’

Jareth has long felt they didn’t fit in with the crowd, in part because of their diagnosis of Ehlers-Danlos syndrome, a chronic condition affecting connective tissue.

EDS causes Jareth to have stretchy skin, leading to the nickname ‘Mr Elastic’ from his doctors, and intense pain.

Jareth says: ‘The condition means I can pop my joints out on purpose, which was a fun party trick when I was a kid.

‘Now I realise why I could do that. My pain in my joints got worse as I got older and I would find it harder to move day to day.

‘I get to a chiropractor once every two weeks and see a physical therapist once a week, as well as smoking medicinal marijuana for the pain – but there is currently no cure for EDS.’

Jareth uses body modification to look as different as possible (Picture: PA Real Life)

In their late 20s, Jareth began to take testosterone injections and had surgery to remove their breasts.

But even during transition, things didn’t feel quite right.

‘I thought being a trans man would solve all of my issues and inner battles with finding out who I was, but I wasn’t as happy as I expected to be,’ says Jareth.

‘I felt like I was trying to fit into someone else’s box. I didn’t want to be constrained – that’s when I discovered what agender was.

‘I’d always been obsessed with aliens, too, and what it means to be extraterrestrial, so the idea of being an agender alien fit perfectly as an identity for me.’

Part of Jareth’s identity is body modifications to appear as unique as possible.

Jareth has a huge circuit board tattooed on their face, does not have nipples following top surgery, shaves off their eyebrows, and has 78 stars tattooed all over their body. They hope to get 333 star tattoos eventually, as three is their lucky number.

(Picture: PA Real Life)

Fashion helps, too. Jareth wears neon, gothic, and pastel clothing inspired by Harajuku style.

Sadly, Jareth’s family does not support their decision to become an alien.

But Jareth hopes that by sharing their story, they’ll give hope to others who feel different.

‘My family still see me as a trans man, because they don’t understand what agender or alien really means,’ says Jareth.

‘I have online friends who support me, but offline is harder. Not everyone understands – but that’s okay. I don’t expect them to get it, I only want acceptance.

‘People treat me like a freak because I’m an alien, but it’s a completely valid thing to call yourself.

‘Who is anyone to tell you who you can or can’t be? If someone wants to identify as anything, even an animal, let them.

‘I feel sorry for people who attack me online. I think they lack empathy and just want to target me, so I deal with it pretty well by brushing it off.

‘I’m happy with who I am and will continue to become more alien-like every day.’

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